Tuesday, March 6, 2018

Living in the Shadow of Hope~

I sit on the patio well past the moment dark first arrives.

Maybe, it's because I am waiting for my man to come to the sliding glass door as he always did.

"Hey, Beautiful.  Are you going to sleep out there, too?"
Then, after giving me that cute look of his, this:
"Here, let me help you bring your laptop and all the rest of you back inside for the night."

When the beautiful of Spring would unfold,
I would always squeeze every last bit of daylight out of the day
and even indulge in some moments of night
because I knew he would always come.

Now, the dark just keeps getting darker.
And my heart still misses him so much, at times,
I wonder if this journey of grief will ever feel different.
And no matter how long I sit on this patio -
the heartbreaking reality of it all is still this:
my Handsome Honey isn't going to come and help me back inside.

It's life,
or the death part of life -
and my head totally gets it.

It's my heart that still wrestles with it all,
on and off,
now and then,
more times than not.

But, honestly,
I'm ok with the battle between the two
because eventually,
the battle becomes so intense a referee is needed,
and thankfully,
each time,
God steps in and does what only He can do.

His sweet Spirit,
knowing my heart better than even my love,
gently draws me to Him,
and helps me find my way back.

Back inside.
Back to what now is.
Back to the reality that even though I feel so very alone,
I am not
because the great I AM is here.

And this same beautiful of Spring
that has me out on the patio in the first place,
is the same beautiful my heart needs to embrace
time and time again.

For just like tulips now risen from well beneath the ground,
Spring reminds us of the blessed hope we have in and through Christ Jesus, our Lord.

And just like today,
on a day when I hate to see night come,
I know if I trust God through the dark,
morning is right around the corner.

Death takes from us the one we love
but it can never take from us
what the Lover of our Soul did for us on Calvary.

Death reminds us of the separation
between this earth and our eternal home,
but it cannot separate us from
the love of our Heavenly Father

Death leaves us wishing for more -
and thankfully
because of the
death and resurrection of our precious Jesus,
we have the beautiful of more coming.

God willing,
tomorrow I will get more hours of daylight.

And soon,
you and I will know the ultimate more we have been promised -

a more that will find us reunited with those who we miss
with a missing that doesn't seem to end,

a more that will find us face to face with The One who we
have longed to worship and adore for all eternity.

Weeping may endure for a night,
but joy comes in the morning.
~Psalms 30:5

But now,
now it's time for me to let God help me make my way back inside.

it's time for me to let God help me with my laptop
and finding my way back here -
back to my keyboard
and back to writing once again, too.

it's time for me to let God bring all the rest of me
to where I now belong
while I wait for the promised more  . . .
abiding and trusting in Him.

1 comment:

Thank you for leaving a "heartprint" of your own.