Sunday, October 9, 2011

Beyond Frustration~

Breathe in.

 Breathe out.

Breathe in.

 Breathe out.

As the confrontation heated up, I kept telling myself to simply breathe in and breathe out. And remarkably, I was able to stay calm and in control through all of it.

Well, on the outside at least.

On the inside, it was an entirely different scene altogether. Inside I felt tight, tense and totally frustrated! Not frustrated with the person on the other end of this trying conversation, but frustrated with myself for being frustrated!!! AGAIN! You see, this isn't my first trip around this mountain. Been here. Done this. Not once. Not twice. But, close to a bazillion times! And each time it happens, I feel all the more frustrated.

God has given us everything we need to stay in control...


After all, isn't self-control one of the fruit of the Spirit? Yes, indeed. Unfortunately, my self-control was only thinking about self and leaving me totally out of control. Later that evening as I tried to wash the day away, God spoke to my heart.

It's a pride issue, Stacy.

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And, of course, as always, He was right.

If you stop and think about it, almost every single argument, confrontation or conflict stems from a prideful heart. Whether we want to admit that or not, it is true. If we have nothing to prove, it doesn't matter what anyone says to us. If we aren't worried about our feelings, it doesn't matter how harsh the words or how bitter the tone. If we aren't worried about self, self has nothing to worry about.


As a Christian, with the spirit of the living God living inside me, I have been given the fruit of the spirit. BUT, and this is a HUGE BUT, is up to me to yield to this precious fruit.

But He giveth more grace; therefore He saith, "God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble." Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw nigh to God, and He will draw nigh to you. James 4:6-8

Instead of breathing in and breathing out, I should have been breathing in the Spirit of God. When I started to feel pride taking over and self-control slipping through my fingers, I should have submitted my heart to God. I should have prayed for His Spirit to take control. I should have...but I didn't.

If only I would have surrendered to the Holy Spirit, the devil would have had no other choice but to flee. My inner man would have been infused with the Spirit of God and the fruit of the Spirit would have been evident in my life. My peace, on the outside and as well as deep inside, would have been genuine.

God's ways are always best. Pride does nothing but cause us to fall (Proverbs 16:18)! Pride does nothing but frustrate us beyond words!

When conflict comes, when confrontation shows up at our heart's door, when an argument is heading our way looking for a place to happen, we have a choice to make.We can stand proud and hold our head up high or we can humble ourself before God. We can try to handle the heat all on our own or we can wisely submit our will to the will of our Father and draw near to God.

anger, frustration, hurt feelings, tense muscles and restless sleep


love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control

The choice is ours.

Heavenly Father,Thank you for searching my heart and revealing to me (once again!) the pride that seeks to take up permanent residence there. How often I stumble and fall. Thank you that you are always there to catch me. Father God, I am tired of making the same mistakes. I am tired of going around this same mountain. Help me to choose wisely. Help me to choose YOU. Help me to win the battle of pride by daily choosing to humble myself and to draw near to you. Thank you for your forgiveness. Thank you for the gift of your precious Holy Spirit. Thank you for loving me enough to lead me in your paths of righteousness and true joy. In Jesus' name, Amen~

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  1. This is a truly inspiring and powerful post on self control Stacy! :)

    So often we react with pride and self importance, or anger and aggression, rather than obeying and submitting to God and trusting that He has a greater plan. We certainly do have a choice! :)

    Blessings and hugs,

  2. I love this! Such encouraging Truth!

  3. Hi Stacy - if only my brain kicked in before my mouth and I 'choose' then before the argument or whatever ensues, I'd be a few steps ahead. But I think that comes with constantly going back to God's word and the desire to do things His way. Great post Stacy, great encouragement (and great to know I'm not alone in these struggles :) )
    God bless

  4. Thx for the reminder that we need to submit to the Holy Spirit.

  5. Oh, how I always want to choose self-control. I've struggled with pride SO much -- and even on issues that pertain to God -- He will prove Himself. It is not my job. My job is to be a witness. His job is to change hearts.

  6. God has been teaching my the very same lesson. I have been getting so upset in my interactions with a fellow believer and He has been showing me that it is my pride that is causing this issue. Thank you for the beautiful reminder!

  7. Thank you for this beautiful post Stacy,

    pride is a horrible thing to have to wrestle with, like so many other things we unwittingly cling on to such as fear it blocks us from receiving and prevents us from letting go.

    I pray that you will find the peace, strength and courage to do both.

  8. Amazing insight... totally rearranges my view of confrontation! Thanks for the depth of wisdom you have shared today.

  9. You're so right. Pride is the reason why we (I) need to have the last word and make sure everyone understands we're (I'm) right. Pride. Belch.

    A tough, honest post.

  10. just lovely

    breathe in, breathe out -- I need this today

  11. I struggle a lot with pride and self-righteousness, so this hits home hard (in a good way!), Stacy.

  12. Stacy:

    Several weeks ago, I began writing a series of posts on the fruit of the Spirit. I have yet to write the last one - self control.

    You are right - we have the fruit, but it is up to us to yield to the Holy Spirit in order that we might produce frui.

    And yes, pride is a big stumbling block, one with which I often struggle.



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